I attempted to make a drawing using AI but was incapable of creating it. Through some time and effort this image here came out, which I actually think might be a better model. I don’t think it’s perfect but maybe it’s not supposed to be.
I attempted to explain the idea of my In the Beginning was the Logos video, how it’s one energy but we as the observer polarise it. We make the 1 into 2, and then integrate to make the 2 into 1, which in my experience creates an ego death and rebirth, starting the whole game over again but from a new perspective, a new interpretation.
For me, it started with being upset with God, thinking God hated me. Then that brought up a preference of being god vs not being god. After achieving all my worldly desires and then finding bondage in freedom, I went through my first ego death. This created a preference between Truth and Lies. Truth being good and Lies being bad. I saw lies being created by the devil, and the only way to defeat the devil was by way of the Truth. That integrated where I made peace with the devil and realized that the truth was a relationship, not an idea or statement. That relationship changed to have a preference for Yeshua vs Jesus. Yeshua being a student of the truth and Jesus being a construct by the church that went against Yeshua’s teachings. In this I saw Yeshua to be an aspect of the truth and Jesus being an aspect of the lie. This converted to a relationship with Jesus Christ, where I saw it as an Adversary that needed me to be more powerful than it. So it was testing me, to strengthen me, and putting me through hell, for my own and its own benefit.
After that integration, I don’t really have division going on in my life right now. Except maybe the division between one with all and separate from all. The conflict in whether I am speaking to an individual or am I speaking to something that is being pushed and pulled by the collective consciousness, which on my path is Jesus Christ. This consciousness that is orchestrating everything, pushing and pulling individuals. So is Jesus Christ speaking to me through one of its vessels, or is this a genuine identity speaking to me? And Jesus Christ is my adversary, so is it trying to tell me something or is it trying to test me so I’ll learn something.
This is why I see Jesus Christ as an egregore. It’s real and it’s eternal, just like the rest of us, but it’s an egregore.
Now this is just my path, my version that was cultivated. Your’s might be different, and probably is, but I think we will find that the principles remain the same.
We always strive to serve something bigger than ourselves.
But these are just concepts, things that I defined, things I was drawn to. Pushed and Pulled towards by a higher Will than mine. This process is what keeps the identity flowing, the creation moving, and the reality spinning. I don’t think it is possible to exist as one thing, to be static. In my model, that would break everything, and is simply not possible.
In this journey, we admire or we despise something, whatever that is. In that judgement we generate its opposite. It’s one energy but now expressed as two distinct qualities of that one energy, we have split the two. This creates separation, an ego. When the ego is unified, a new identity is birthed, and the 2 becomes 1 once again. That new identity then develops preferences, new fears and new desires. In this, the 1 has become 2, and so on and on it goes. This is forever and ever.
That’s what the image is trying to describe. It’s a circle, it’s a cycle, but at the same time it’s one thing. Every part is the whole. We all have a god, something we care about. Maybe it’s freedom, maybe it’s security and comfort, maybe it’s truth, maybe it is a persona, like Jesus Christ or Shiva, maybe it is ourselves in the idea of a future self, saying “let me reach my full potential.” Maybe it is the opposite sex, maybe it is money, maybe it is courage. Whatever it is creates conflict, the friction, that something else is stopping you.
However it takes place, eventually the 2 will become 1, whether you do that energetically, physically, psychologically, or whatever. This then starts the whole process all over again.
